The Battle

We finished our battle
With a loud rattle.

We used swords
Made out of wood boards.

We used some guns
Which fired some buns.

We used a tank
Which had a walk-the-plank.

We had an army
Whose name was Barney.

We were wearing metal clothes
Which killed the goats.

We used bows and for arrows
We used sparrows.

We used a kite
Because we didn't know how to fight.

I am sick

My name is Edd.
And I am in bed.

My throat is sore.
And is getting much more.

My blood is blue.
And I am getting swine flu.

I have a stomach ache.
And I am getting a tooth ache.

I am having a runny nose.
While I am doing a dance pose.

You have to find
That I am getting blind.

I have got a boil.
And you don't know it's made out of foil.

I have constipation.
And dehydration.

I can't hear
Because I drank too much beer.

I've got a blister.
While feeding my sister.

I think I am going to die.
While saying Goodbye.

Geysers

If you buy a geyser
You will see Julius Ceaser.

If you buy a geyser
Just put that in your freezer.

You use it to boil your water
And watch Harry Potter.

They have a wire
Which is made out of car tire.

If it gives you current shock
That means you just need to take a walk.

The Snake

There was a snake
Who loved to rake
While eating cake
And drinking chocolate shake

He only knew how to slither
While getting much bigger
And saw an ant much smaller
And got one dollar

He was very long
And he played the gong
And sang a song
And always went wrong

He wears lots of shirts
While getting lots of hurts
And his name was Gurts

The Mouse

There was a mouse
Who lived in a farmhouse

He ate lots of cheese
Which belonged to the bees

He went to school
In a swimming pool

His name is Burt
Because he plays in dirt

Where does he sleep?
He sleeps on a sheep

He loves a girl
And once he gave her a pearl

You know he has a tail
Because you read a fairy tale

He lives with a farmer
And his mother lives much farther

You've got to know that he is really a rat
Who is being chased by a cat!

Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!

Cellphones

Cellphones have microphones
They have some games
Of the Thames

It has a clock
Which gives current shock

You can take a picture
Of a picture

If you want to send an email
You have to know your gmail

You get so crazy about cellphones
You didn't even choose your ring tones

You've got to pay five thousand bucks
And for change, you get ducks

You have some rates
Which you pay by plates

They have a sim card
So you can see Cacofonix the Bard (Asterix characters)

If you get some free Tintax (drink in Asterix)
They have probably got it from Dipsomaniax (Asterix characters)

And that's why do buy a cellphone!

Fresh natural healthy chewing-gum

My Dad and I discovered this in Palampur.

Take some wheat from the fields and chew their seeds. Just go on chewing them. You will find them tasty and it's fresh, natural, very healthy chewing-gum. You can swallow them when your jaws ache but they never end until you swallow them.

Rajdhani Express

In Rajdhani train
You can see a plane

People are rice
Which look like lice

You sleep on bunks
Which have some trunks

The engine
has an engine

There was one wheel
Which used to squeal

It ran about
On a trout

It then broke
And became a rope

And that was the end of the Rajdhani Express

Batty Bat

There is a bat
Who is very fat

She is very small
Because she has a doll

She cries all the time
Because she goes to the shrine

She flies and flies
And eats flies

She likes to be black
And goes on the railway track
So she gets to say "attack"

Once she said
I am very scared

So turn off the day
And turn on the dark

The Dog

There is a dog
Who saw a hog
In the fog
Caught on a log.

Then he saw a race
Happening in space
With some shoe lace
With everyone eating Lays [chips].

Then he saw a squirt
Wearing his t-shirt
With his skirt
Whose name was Dirt

Then he went home
Straight to Rome
And saw a dome

Cricket

If you see a cricket match
You will get a catch

If you see Dhoni
He is riding on a pony

They don't drink rum
Because they play the drum

They have a bat
Which looks like a rat

If they kill a yak
They get 1 lac

They play in the grass
Which they got in my class

They bowl on the sand
Which they got in Lego Land

There was a cricket man
Who tried to eat a fish can

That's why don't go for a cricket MATCH

Bridges

The Golden Gate bridge
is on a ridge.

They call it bridge
because they ate a fridge.

They made it out of metal
coz they drank tea in a kettle.

It was made for cars
so they could see the stars.

They made it in France
so they could have a glance.

They love to dance
because they have some fans.

It's across the waters
to catch the robbers.

You can see it on the globe
because you are wearing a robe.

If you don't do it
they will make you glue it.

Books

If you buy a book,
You've got to move your rook.

If you buy a book,
Why didn't you pay your cook?

You have got to take a look
If you don't buy a book.

You get to go on,
So you get a Logan (car).

If you read in the night,
You've got to turn right.

You've to got to know
There's a book almost snow.

There's a book about cars
Coz I could see my rock stars.

Do you use sprinklers?
I learnt this in Twinklers (school).

There' s a very big book
Which is hung on a hook.

Some people are happy
Because you threw your nappy.